You call me beloved child.
You know each scar,
visible and invisible.
You know each love,
In love for each of us,
you have filled creation
with spectrums of diversity
beyond human categories and labels.
I give thanks for the uniqueness within me.
For my curls and my wisdom,
for my quirks and my compassion,
for the secret parts of me that are harder to share.
I pray for courage,
and for assurance.
As I share one more piece of who I am,
may it be met with acceptance,
For those who have traveled this path before me,
I give thanks for their guidance and companionship.
Protect the tender corners of my soul,
the ones that fear.
Take away the wish for a different way
and leave in its place radical acceptance,
May the truth spoken
be a balm for my broken heart,
cracked by the pressure of words left unsaid.
May I know the strength of your spirit,
your holy peace,
as I embody more fully
the beloved child you created good, very good.
You who gave Moses Aaron so he could speak truth to Pharaoh,
You who restored Zachariah's voice at John's birth,
You who told Mary to go and tell the disciples,
You who healed the sick with but a word,
You O God,
can infuse my words with truth,
can strengthen my voice,
can heal the scars from the words I trapped inside.
I'm finding a new voice.
Seeking a conduit
for the thoughts, prayers, cries
of my authentic heart.
It wants to be heard
but it stumbles
and it falls silent.
words still caught in my throat
as I figure out how to
turn off filters
and translation settings
so long employed,
in pursuit of what is true.
In pursuit of what is me.
Sprinkles of truth.
Tentative test balloons.
Working an unused muscle,
stiff and weak,
but there all the same.
Guide me to the words.
Words of hope and love.
Words of challenge and confession.
Let me not forget silence,
or sling words too brashly.
May my words, my silence, my listening